DCLnews
Special Report:
 Beavers
Are Not Rock & Roll Fans
When a talking beaver told DCLnews editor, John Shreeve (pictured),
that it didn't like rock & roll, he thought he was hearing things...
Last
time I was in the US on vacation (I live in the UK), I had an experience
that led me to doubt my sanity. I was out in the wetlands of Florida
and had parked up for a break from driving. There wasn't a living soul
for miles, so I'd got my window wound down and was sipping a beer and
listening to Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers very loudly on
the stereo.
And then
there was a loud BANG!!! on the hood of my car...
I jumped
out of my skin so hard my head nearly went through the roof. But I soon
calmed down when I saw that it was only a talking beaver jumping up
and down on the the hood. I say "talking" beaver, but to be
more exact he was a shouting beaver.
"Turn
that goddamn music down, will ya?" my furry friend screamed. "Us
beavers hate rock & roll - it's a tuneless noise. And, besides,
some of us are tryin' to git some sleep around here!"
 I
quickly turned the music down. But wondered if someone had slipped something
in that beer I was drinking. Was I hearing things? I really believed
beavers liked rock & roll - didn't you? After all, beavers look
pretty much like rock stars with all that hair and whiskers (the late
and great Jerry Garcia springs to mind), so you naturally assume they're
into rock music...
But a
recent ABC7 News item revealed that what the beaver said was true -
they really don't like rock & roll.
ABC7 News
reported that a group of beavers in Tallahassee, Fl, are being driven
out of wetlands by rock music blared at them by a construction company
that wants the critters to stop building dams. The dams are interfering
with development.
Since
January, county officials and the builders have been trying to find
a way to get rid of the beavers. The animals have built dams that block
a storm water system for a new store at the development site. Crews
tore down the dams, but the beavers kept rebuilding them.
Perhaps
someone remembered how in 1989 the U.S. military blasted General Noriega
with rock & roll while he was holed up in the Vatican Embassy in
Panama, and thought it might work with beavers too.
One thing
is certain, I missed my chance for a big consultancy fee. I could've
told them beavers don't like rock & roll - after all, I'd heard
it from the beaver's mouth...
John E.
Shreeve
DCLnews Editor
[page no longer available on ABC7
And
if you see any strange, quirky, or just plain funny, items from the
news, send them to me at DCLnews@dclab.com
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